(collected by Rodney Hoffman of Occidental College)
Brooks' Law: "Adding people to a late software project makes it later."
Weinberg's Law: "If builders built buildings the way programmers write programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization."
Parkinson's Law of Data: "Data expands to fill the space available for storage."
Lubarshky's Law of Cybernetic Entomology: "There's always one more bug."
Ralph's Observation: "It is a mistake to let any mechanical device realize that you are in a hurry."
90% Rule of Project Schedules: "The first 90% of the task takes 90% of the time, and the last 10% takes the other 90%."
Dvorak's Axiom 43: "A programmer who wears T-shirts and polyester pants shouldn't design screens."
The First Law of Programmer Creativity: "The cost of software maintenance increases with the square of the programmer's creativity."
The Second Law of Programmer Creativity: "Any program written by a truly gifted programmer cannot be maintained."
"The only way to get a software engineer to finish a program is to divert his attention and steal it off his desk."
Lerman's Law of Technology: "Any technical problem can be overcome, given enough time and money."
Lerman's Corollary: "You are never given enough time or money."
Finagles' 8th Rule: "Teamwork is essential; it allows you to blame someone else."
"A programmer's work is never done until the last user is dead."
A good collection of programming quotes and quips:
http://www.juixe.com/techknow/index.php/2008/08/17/favorite-programming-quotes/
A collection of quotes from Alan Perlis:
http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/a/alan_perlis.html
And, from the same source, quotes from Edsger Dijkstra:
http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/e/edsger_dijkstra.html
You can find more there from, among others, Isaac Asimov, Dave Barry, Larry Ellison, Douglas Engelbart, Bill Gates, Ray Kurzweil, Nicholas Negroponte, Ted Nelson, Cliff Stoll, and Steve Wozniak.